I didn't want to talk to anyone so I didn't take my phone.
This isn't an infringement on my friends because I love my friends,
just a mental health day where you need some self loving outside the bed-room.
Nothing really caused today, nothing in particular, just an unwinding day that I wanted and can do.
I started by spending £20 in Boots, proving that it is possible. Then too much in Topman, but these jeans and t-shirts are hot. Then I bought a sketchbook, a sharpiner, a 2B, B and HB pencils.
Then I wondered down into Salford, got slightly lost had to cross the motor way to get to the riverside. Got there started walking and a duck started hissing at me, so I gate it my £3 pound salmon dinner that it didn't even want but it was enough to distract it so I could make my heroic getaway.
So I kept walking, sat down for a little bit and doodled in my new sketchbook, the drawing just really an outline that I'm going to add surealist art too. Then people kept walking past looking at my masterpiece and I thought what on earth they must be thinking when they look at it. I can't draw btw. I wanted to listen to Moby but I realised I'd forgotten my headphones.
So I stayed there for a wee while then went back into town a route I hadn't taken or recognised before, I wouldn't know what to do had I got lost, with no phone, and no numbers of the top of my head apart from 999 and 911 and 2010.
I eventually found my little way passing my best mate and his girlfriends house and noticing that homeless guy who is always there. He once said to me 'do you like the way you look at me' I thought, no, but I'm horiffically glad not to be in your shoes. So I thought, fuck it I can afford it, and I turned around walked up to him and gave him a tenner. He gave me the general ohh thank you reply, as if it didn't matter whether it was 1p or a house, he was in need and he knew it, and he's used to it. It felt horrible but good, the rush wasn't worth it but I'm not here to proclaim I'm a helpful selfless person becasue I'm not, I just gave him it without realisation almost. Then I walked up oxford road and got some food after walking out of the queue of McDonalds, thinking 'I'm going to help the little people' even though I walked into Starbucks. Then I walked up the street and saw a guy pick cigarette buds off the ground, he wore his hood up, I wanted to say 'it's not a crime dude you don't have to give the police a target' then I walked past him and sparked up, I sort of knew he would ask, so I agve him a Marlboro Red. This again isn't helping because again I could afford to so I did, and tbh smoking kills. had I been poor and given him one then maybe I would have felt better about myself. But this isn't an issue of myself, even though it's sort of selfish, I don't really care.
Got home planned my night, and got offered a trial shift in a bar next week. I like to think that was karma, not for the deeds of today (becasue we established they weren't good or bad) but for the day before when me and Kiera may have well been pitchforked. Also for the other day when I hopped a railing hungover and fell flat on my face on Oxford Road, luckily I'm smooth and post-modern liek that I can get away with it. Hahahah can I fuck.
